January 27th, 2011 | 
Author: 
So, you think you’re the only one who struggles with meditation? Trust me, you’re not! And to help reassure you of that fact, I thought I’d share a typical meditation moment. The one that occurs after I’ve dimmed the lights, shut off the computer, turned off the phone ringer (I use the Zen Timer on my phone to time my meditation), arranged my meditation cushions, settled in, closed my eyes and started to focus inward seeking the peace, quiet and serenity, only to find the reality of practice.
Inhale. Exhale. Oh, I must shift, I’m not comfortable, I’ll never be able to sit for 30 minutes. Ok. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale … Are my sit bones even? Focus! Back to the breath. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Did I remember to put bread on the grocery list? Iggy’s bread would be good, wonder if there’ll be any left? Darn it! Focus! Inhale. Exhale. In- my neighbors are so freakin’ loud! Wish they were kinder to each other. No! Focus on the breath. Ok, here I go. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Ex- My god, was that my stomach?! Guess I’m hungry. Wonder how that new recipe will taste. I can’t wait to try it, maybe add some fresh basil … Wait! Focus! Inhale. Exhale. Focus on the breath. Nothing else to do. Bring the attention to the breath. Shoot! Still thinking. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Wonder how long I’ve been sitting? But look, I’m not reacting to that itch. That’s something. Oh, no, don’t be smug … you’re not focusing on the breath! Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. My back aches. I’m out of shape. I can’t believe I’ve let myself get so far from my practice it aches to sit here. Oh! Judging. Mean! Focus. On. The. Breath! Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Did I remember to reschedule that meeting for tomorrow? Ugh, I’m so stressed. I can’t believe how this project is going. Ah! Crap! STOP. Focus. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale … I wonder if I should move the bed against the wall and the chair over … Ah! Thinking! Inhale. Exhale …
And thus it goes. It’s called practice because it takes a LOT of practice. Meditating is my Yogic Waterloo. It probably IS the most important aspect of a yoga practice, and it’s the one with which I struggle the most, while knowing it’s also the greatest gift I can give myself. It’s also the greatest gift you can give yourself. So, go sit down for five minute, or thirty, and just breathe, and see what happens.
Shanti, Shanti, Namaste
Posted in meditation, Yoga | 
Tags: compassion, meditation, Meditation practice, mindfulness, practice, Stay present, Yoga practice, Zen Timer
I am not alone then. Meditation is hard for me until a yoga teacher friend pointed out I get mine in other ways. Cycling down a country road, snowshoeing through virgin forest – you also find yourself in a non-thinking, just absorbing state.
I do find some time for the more usual – cushion, low lights, no noise meditation but not on a regular schedule, I just take that when the time is right and don’t worry about it.
It’s true! You can find meditation in moving activities, too. One of the reasons I love hiking and snowshoeing so much is that just like Yoga, it’s an activity that can stop my brain. One must be present in those activities, or risk injury. Moving meditation … it’s pretty much what we strive for in Asana practice.
Thanks for sharing! Shanti.
Deb